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Weird National Briefs (09/01/2021)

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Porn payout

GRAND HAVEN, Mich. (AP) — A judge has ordered a western Michigan couple to pay $30,441 to their son for getting rid of his pornography collection.

U.S. District Judge Paul Maloney’s decision this week came eight months after David Werking, 43, won a lawsuit against his parents.

He said they had no right to throw out his collection of films, magazines and other items. Werking had lived at their Grand Haven home for 10 months after a divorce before moving to Muncie, Indiana.

The judge followed the value set by an expert, reported. Werking’s parents also must pay $14,500 to their son’s attorney.

After moving to Indiana, Werking learned that his possessions were missing.

“Frankly, David, I did you a big favor getting rid of all this stuff,” his dad said in an email.

TME – Time to be an adult.

Holy cow!

MARSHFIELD, Wis. (AP) — Spotted in a car at a McDonald’s drive-through in Wisconsin: A cow — all of it.

Jessica Nelson of Mosinee pulled into the drive-through at a McDonald’s in Marshfield on Thursday and said she looked up to see a cow in the backseat of a Buick sedan three cars ahead of her.

“I thought it was fake at first. Who puts a cow in a Buick?” she told The Associated Press on Friday. “Then its whole head moved.”

She quickly picked up her phone and shot video of the bovine.

“I just took the video of it because I was blown away there was a cow in the back of a Buick,” she said.

She posted the video on her Facebook page with the caption “A WHOLE FREAKING COW!!! Tell me you live in Wisconsin without telling me you live in Wisconsin.” She also pasted a message on the video itself that read “That’s a whole (expletive) cow in the back of that car!”

By Friday afternoon the video had gotten 112,000 views.

Nelson said that the family of the cow’s owner saw the post and contacted her. They said that the cow was actually a calf. She said the owner had just purchased it and two other calves — which were in the backseat as well but were lying down out of sight — at an auction.

TME – What kind of sadist takes a cow to McDonald’s?

Chalk block

DETROIT (AP) — Parking scofflaws unite!

A woman with 14 tickets has won a major decision in a dispute over whether a Michigan city violated the U.S. Constitution by chalking her car tires without a search warrant.

It’s a novel argument. Alison Taylor’s lawyer said the Fourth Amendment’s ban against unreasonable searches was triggered when a Saginaw parking enforcer applied chalk marks and returned two hours later to see if the car still was there.

Saginaw cited an exception to the Fourth Amendment, but a federal appeals court said it doesn’t fit.

“For nearly as long as automobiles have parked along city streets, municipalities have found ways to enforce parking regulations without implicating the Fourth Amendment,” Judge Richard Griffin said in a 3-0 opinion Wednesday.

“Thus, tire chalking is not necessary to meet the ordinary needs of law enforcement, let alone the extraordinary,” he said.

Parking enforcer Tabitha Hoskins would take notes and sometimes chalk tires in areas where there was a time limit but no meters. The city said chalking was a signal to motorists that vehicles were being watched.

“The city has significant interests that are furthered by enforcing its parking ordinances through the use of chalk, and these interests greatly outweigh the minimal intrusion that a chalk mark creates,” Saginaw said in a court filing.

The 6th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals overturned a ruling in favor of Saginaw and sent the case back to U.S. District Judge Thomas Ludington for the next steps. It was Taylor’s second trip to the appeals court.

TME – Or maybe just move your car?

Bear necessities

BRISTOL, Conn. (AP) — A Connecticut woman who had a package stolen from her front step discovered the culprit was a black bear.

Kristin Levine, of Bristol, posted home surveillance video on Facebook on Monday, showing the bear sauntering across her driveway with the Amazon package in its mouth.

“Yea so if anyone sees an Amazon package in the Chippens Hill area with my name on it…feel free to bring it back?” Levine wrote in her post.

Levine told NBC Connecticut she received an alert from her security system about five minutes after Amazon dropped of the package and was “taken aback because I wasn’t expecting anyone else in my driveway.”

The bear, she said ended up dropping off the parcel in a neighbor’s yard. It was apparently not interested in the contents: several rolls of toilet paper, she said.

“It was hysterical like I said, I knew nothing in there was going to be irreplaceable so it was a fun afternoon for sure,” Levine said.

Levine’s post received numerous comments, including from people comparing it to the bear from the Charmin toilet paper commercials.

TME – That’s what you get for ordering picnic baskets on Amazon.

Oh bee-have!

BOYNE CITY, Mich. (AP) — A truck hauling beehives crashed and overturned along a northern Michigan roadway, unleashing a big swarm of bees, police said.

The truck overturned about 2 p.m. Wednesday and dumped its load of bee boxes along a Charlevoix County road, prompting police to urge residents to keep windows and doors closed.

“There was a very large swarm,” Charlevoix County Sheriff Charles Vondra said Thursday.

He said he was told that upwards of 50 million bees were in the truck’s load of bee boxes when it crashed near Boyne City, a community about 260 miles (418.4 kilometers) northwest of Detroit.

Local firefighters sprayed water on the boxes to keep the insects cool in the heat of the day until beekeepers could arrive and begin retrieving the hive-filled boxes and loading them onto trucks that hauled them away, he said.

Vondra said it’s estimated that several hundred thousand bees never made it back into the boxes. But bee boxes were placed Thursday morning at the crash site in hopes that some would fly back into those boxes for removal, he said.

No residents were stung by the bees, but Vondra said some beekeepers got stung while they were collecting and loading the boxes onto trucks that removed them from the scene.

TME – Another reminder that buzzed driving is not OK.

Last modified on Wednesday, 01 September 2021 08:06


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