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Weird National Briefs (08/14/2019)

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Ursine of the times

DENVER - A black bear broke into a Colorado house over the weekend and left by breaking through a wall “like the Kool-Aid Man.”

Estes Park police say the break-in occurred Friday night and that the animal was likely attracted to trash.

A Facebook post by the police department said: “Upon officer’s arrival, said bear forcibly breached a hole in the wall like the `Kool-Aid Man’ and made its escape.”

The Denver Post reports no one was injured.

Colorado Parks and Wildlife said bears entered over 35 vehicles and nine residences in the Estes Park area in the 10 days before Aug. 3. Residents were encouraged to close and lock all doors and windows to homes and vehicles.

TME – And for the love of God, hide your picnic baskets.

Playing through

GIBSONTON, Fla. - Authorities say a 56-year-old Florida man took his golf cart on a wild ride through a Walmart store, terrorizing shoppers and ignoring deputies’ orders to stop before crashing into a cash register.

Hillsborough County Sheriff’s investigators say they were summoned to the store near Tampa on Thursday, where they found Michael Dale Hudson blocking the liquor store entrance with his golf cart. The Tampa Bay Times reports he was demanding to speak to a manager.

As deputies spoke to Hudson, they say he suddenly drove toward the store’s main entrance. Customers jumped out of the way as he barreled through the door. He raced toward the checkout area, hitting several customers.

He was jailed on multiple charges, including aggravated battery. A lawyer wasn’t listed in jail records.

TME – We assumed driving a golf cart into a Walmart was Florida’s state sport.

Grand theft ambulance

PHOENIX - A 29-year-old woman is accused of climbing over a fence at a Phoenix fire station, driving off in an ambulance and crashing it into a fence after being chased by police.

The Police Department said in a statement that nobody was injured in the incident which began when the ambulance was stolen early Wednesday morning.

Police said Kimberly Vasich was jailed on suspicion of theft of means of transportation and multiple other crimes.

Police Sgt. Maggie Cox said Wednesday that no additional information was immediately available on circumstances of the incident, while Fire Department officials did not immediately respond to an inquiry by The Associated Press.

Online court records don’t indicate whether Vasich has an attorney who could comment on the allegations.

TME – Maybe it was an emergency.

Lavatory lightning

PORT CHARLOTTE, Fla. (AP) _ A Florida woman says lightning destroyed her septic tank and caused a toilet in her house to explode.

Marylou Ward tells television station WINK News that the sole toilet in her Port Charlotte home was shattered into hundreds of pieces on Sunday.

Ward says the explosion was the loudest sound she’s ever heard, and that she also smelled smoke. She says a plumber told her lightning hit the methane gas that was built up in the pipes from feces.

Ward says she’ll have to get the toilet and septic system repaired, but she’s thankful no one was injured.

TME – Sure thing, lady – a “lightning strike.” Whatever you say.

Emoji escapades

MANHATTAN BEACH, Calif. - A Southern California seaside community is in an uproar after a home was given a new paint job featuring two huge emojis on a bright pink background.

Manhattan Beach residents railed against the makeover during a City Council meeting Tuesday night, citing problems with spectators.

One speaker called the paint job graffiti and another said it was an attack on neighbors.

Both bright yellow emojis are cross-eyed and have distinctly big eyelashes.

One has a goofy expression with its tongue hanging out. The other has its mouth zippered shut.

The new paint job appeared after neighbors reported the home was being used for short-term rentals and the homeowner was fined $4,000.

Owner Kathryn Kidd told KABC-TV she didn’t realize short-term rentals weren’t allowed and she denies the redecoration is retaliation.

TME – At least it wasn’t an eggplant.

Turtles all the way … across

WEST LAFAYETTE, Ind. - A northern Indiana city has installed “Turtle Xing” signs along a road after an 8-year-old boy warned the mayor that motorists were running over turtles on the move.

Jack Wietbrock wrote West Lafayette Mayor John Dennis a letter last month asking him to install a sign advising motorists to keep watch for turtles along Cherry Lane.

The second-grader wrote that “there are turtles crossing the road and they need our help.” He included a hand-drawing of a car stopped and someone carrying a turtle, captioning that image with, “We saved a baby turtle.”

The Journal & Courier reports that the mayor instructed the city’s street department to make “Turtle Xing” signs. Some of those signs recently went up along Cherry Lane. Other signs will be installed along a second road.

TME – That’s one shell of a nice kid.

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