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Weird National Briefs (04/18/2018)

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Beer we go!

SEBASTIAN, Fla. - A Florida man asked the store clerk, “What would happen if I stole some beer?”

Police say Christopher Maxwell soon found out.

Sebastian police told TCPalm.com the 33-year-old Maxwell entered a convenience store at 2:30 a.m. Friday but was told he couldn't buy beer because alcohol sales are banned in the city between 1 and 7 a.m. In response to Maxwell's question, the clerk replied she would call 911. Maxwell still grabbed two 18-packs of Bud Light and left. The clerk did as she said.

Police found Maxwell nearby with an 18-pack in each hand. Officers said he struggled when they tried to arrest him. He remained jailed Sunday on charges of petty theft and battery on a police officer. Records don't show if he has an attorney.

TME – Turns out there IS such thing as a stupid question.

UFO foe

SHEFFIELD, Mass. - A memorial in a remote corner of Massachusetts that marks a 1969 UFO sighting has been ordered moved, but one man who experienced a close encounter is objecting.

The 5,000-pound memorial in Sheffield was installed in 2015, but was moved about 30 feet a few weeks later when it was discovered it was on town land.

Now, Town Administrator Rhonda LaBombard tells The Berkshire Eagle it has to be moved again because it's on a town right-of-way easement.

That's not sitting well with Thom Reed. He was 9 when he, his mother, grandmother and brother saw what he described as a “self-contained glow” that flooded their car with an amber light. About 40 people in several surrounding towns reported the strange light.

Reed is threatening legal action.

TME – Even invaders from space are helpless in the face of small-town bureaucracy.

Canine custody

MADEIRA BEACH, Fla. - A rift between two former neighbors has resulted in them sharing custody of a Labrador retriever mix.

The Tampa Bay Times reports that Tina Marie Walker and David Somerville lived next to each other in a Florida apartment complex when he drove her in 2016 to an animal shelter, where she adopted Elario. When she worked, Somerville would take the dog for walks and to the dog park. He says he paid the dog's vet bills.

That led to a rift over who really was the dog's owner and Somerville sued Walker in small claims court. A judge ruled recently that they are to share custody and even drew up a schedule. Walker has moved from the apartment complex but now drops Elario off for his stays with Somerville.

TME – And now we have the plot for the “Kramer vs. Kramer” reboot.

Birthday suit commute

WASHINGTON - Officials say a man boarded a train, took off his clothes and reportedly “acted aggressively” toward customers of Washington's Metro.

Metro spokesman Dan Stessel tells WTOP-FM 24-year-old Deon Tyrel Toye entered the system clothed and took off his shoes, prompting the station manager to call Metro Transit police Thursday. He then boarded the train and took off his clothes.

Officials say the suspect appeared to be under the influence of drugs.

Officials tell The Washington Post the man failed to comply with police directives and was given warnings. An officer then used a stun gun on him and he was taken into custody.

Two victims had minor injuries.

Police tweeted that Toye was charged with several offenses including threats in a menacing manner. It's unclear if he has a lawyer.

TME – I choo-choo-choose to be naked and weirdly hostile.

Eat more chicken … or else

ATLANTA - No one was seriously hurt in a fight involving four women in a Chik-fil-A drive-thru, but another customer who recorded the fracas says it really got crazy when one of them pointed a handgun at another's head.

The cellphone video shows the women leaving their cars at the drive-thru window Wednesday morning. Shouting leads to fists as 24-year-old Vonshay Redding jabs the gun at least a dozen times at the face of another woman, who ultimately slaps the weapon to the ground. Two others get involved, slapping and punching each other.

WSB-TV reports that two of the women involved later called Atlanta police, and Redding was charged with aggravated assault.

WXIA-TV reports that Honey Shaw, who recorded the scene, said she eventually got her breakfast.

TME – This never happens at Arby’s.

Cutout caper

SOUTH BURLINGTON, Vt. - A Vermont restaurant owner is offering a $100 gift certificate to the person who returns a life-size cardboard cutout of himself that was stolen from an airport.

Bob Conlon said Wednesday he has no idea why anyone would want to steal the advertisement for Leunig's Bistro. WCAX-TV reports Conlon would like the cutout back because it cost $350.

Police say surveillance video shows two women taking the cutout of Conlon the night of March 23. Officials say the unidentified women had just gotten off an inbound flight at Burlington International Airport.

Police previously said the advertisement has “significant monetary value.”

TME – There’s only one possible motive – voodoo.

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