Wednesday, 19 February 2020 13:17

Weird National Briefs (02/19/2020)

Written by Allen Adams

DUI (Quality)

LAKE TOMAHAWK, Wis. - A 52-year-old man was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving after striking at least 13 vehicles in the town of Lake Tomahawk, according to the Oneida County Sheriff’s Office.

Robert Allen Johnson, of Thunder Bay, Ontario, was issued several citations for the Friday night incident, s including reckless endangerment, unsafe lane deviation and operating a motor vehicle under the influence, WSAW- TV reported.

The vehicles were all unoccupied and parked.

Authorities say Johnson posted bond of more than $7,000 and was released from custody. He is expected to make his initial court appearance Monday.

TME – Any job worth doing is worth doing well.

Tuesday, 11 February 2020 10:56

Celebrity Slam - Pippi versus the porn star

Written by Allen Adams

One of the many weird side effects of our celebrity-obsessed pop culture is the bubbling up of bizarre cottage industries revolving around people on the fringes of fame being willing to say and do almost anything to maintain any kind of spotlight. Their thirst to be known is unquenchable, their capacity to sacrifice dignity nigh-infinite.

That’s why something like celebrity boxing exists. What better way to get attention than by agreeing to throw punches at another has-been or barely-was? It is crude and exploitative, but hey – any attention is good attention, right?

Take Celebrity Boxing, a promotion run by a kinda shady dude named Damon Feldman wherein D-listers sign on to whale on each other for the delight of … well, we don’t really know WHO this kind of thing delights, but they apparently exist, so there you go.

Feldman’s latest fight is a weird match even by the already bizarre standards of Celebrity Boxing. In one corner, we have Mary Carey, noted porn star and spotlight hound. In the other, we have Tami Erin, whose main claim to fame is playing the titular role in 1988’s “The New Adventures of Pippi Longstocking.”

That’s right – it’s Pippi versus the porn star. The bout is scheduled to go down on April 18, at a Miami strip joint called – and we swear this is true – The Booby Trap.

Tuesday, 11 February 2020 10:52

Weird National Briefs (02/12/2020)

Written by Allen Adams

New Zoo Revue

BELEN, N.M. - A New Mexico couple is facing charges for illegally importing exotic animals, including a mountain lion and kangaroo, for film productions.

Kip and Chelsey Lewis are facing multiple charges of unlawful importation of a nondomestic live animal after New Mexico Department of Game and Fish agents raided their home in December 2018. They were charged last year.

According to court documents, Chelsey Lewis altered documents for the animals, and Kip Lewis lied about the locations of the animals. Both are listed as owners of the A to Z Film Animals company.

Agents found in the couple’s possession a capuchin monkey, a coyote, a prairie dog, a skunk, an American alligator, a raccoon, and a kangaroo, a criminal complaint said.

Their attorney, Jason Alarid, did not immediately return a message.

TME – Doolittle, doo late? I’ll see myself out.

Tuesday, 04 February 2020 10:27

Celebrity Slam - Love, fame and playing the game

Written by Allen Adams

We like to believe that we have our collective finger on the pop cultural pulse here at Celebrity Slam. And in some ways, we do. However, the reality is that the zeitgeist is a good deal slipperier than it was even just a few short years ago. The world in which this feature began is very different than the one in which it currently exists.

There are LOTS more famous people out there than there used to be. Many of those people are famous for similar reasons to those who came before, but with the incredible breadth of entertainment offerings that currently surround us, no one (particularly old and lazy people such as ourselves) can expect to fully keep up.

All of this is a long-winded way of saying that there’s some kind of Halsey/G-Eazy/Meg Thee Stallion love triangle controversy thing and we’re not at all sure how to address it because we have only the vaguest idea of who any of these people are.

Tuesday, 04 February 2020 10:25

Weird National Briefs (02/05/2020)

Written by Allen Adams

Stirring the pot

LEBANON, Tenn. - The rapper Afroman famously sang about how getting high on marijuana prevented him from going to court. A Tennessee man decided to combine the two when he lit a marijuana cigarette in the courtroom, authorities said.

Spencer Alan Boston, 20, was arrested Monday and charged with disorderly conduct and simple possession after sparking up in the courtroom, news outlets reported.

Wilson County Sheriff Robert Bryan said Boston was in court Monday on a simple drug possession charge. Boston approached the bench to discuss his sentence but instead expressed his views on legalizing marijuana.

Boston reached in his pocket, pulled out a marijuana cigarette, lit it, smoked it and was immediately taken into custody, Bryan said.

Sheriff’s Office Lt. Scott Moore said the courtroom crowd chuckled. It’s unclear whether Boston lit up a joint or a blunt but Bryan said the defendant’s marijuana did have a strong odor.

TME – And the joint leads to the joint.

Wednesday, 29 January 2020 13:29

Celebrity Slam - Ex factor

Written by Allen Adams

Finding love isn’t easy. So many of us go through an assortment of trials and tribulations as we seek the person with whom we hope to spend the rest of our lives. And the reality is that even when we believe we’ve found that someone, circumstances don’t always allow our romantic plans to come to fruition.

This is all even MORE complicated when one or both of the parties involved is famous. Fame takes the everyday problems that come from relationships and amplifies them – both the lows and the highs are cranked up to 11, leaving the people involved struggling to work through whatever needs working through.

That being said, it ALSO seems that famous people have a much harder time behaving like civilized grown-ups when those relationships blow up. The glare of the spotlight is intense, and having the general public picking over the debris and detritus of a failed romance has to be hard. Still, at some point, one would assume folks would have to start acting like adults.

Alas, no.

A perfect example comes from the romantic disaster that was the Nicki Minaj/Meek Mill pairing. Those two called it quits some time ago, but a recent incident at a West Hollywood clothing store illustrates that even though both have moved on, the wounds from the situation remain fresh.

Wednesday, 29 January 2020 13:27

Weird National Briefs (01/29/2020)

Written by Allen Adams

Bad bunny

ORLANDO, Fla. - A Florida man who became a video sensation after fighting a man on the street while dressed as the Easter Bunny was arrested and tried to use the costume to elude capture, authorities said.

Antoine McDonald became an overnight phenomenon when a video captured him fighting a man on the streets of Orlando last year.

Earlier this month, McDonald was driving a motorcycle when he ran a stop sign and crashed into a carport before fleeing the scene, according to the Florida Highway Patrol. The carport collapsed on top of the vehicle.

Deputies went to McDonald’s address and spotted a gray car driving away and found McDonald laying in the backseat of the car.

When a deputy went to arrest him, he denied it.

“I wasn’t in any crash. I’m the Orlando Easter bunny, Google it,” he said, according to an arrest report.

The Orlando Sentinel reports authorities asked him to remove his costume before arresting him. He is charged with leaving the scene of a crash involving property damage, driving with a suspended license and operating a motorcycle without a license.

TME – Literally the best “Don’t you know who I am?” ever.

Wednesday, 22 January 2020 13:40

Celebrity Slam - Beef: It’s what’s for breakfast

Written by Allen Adams

It’s no secret that we here at Celebrity Slam love beef. We are never happier than when we have the opportunity to dig into some Grade-A prime cut celebrity beef. We love it when famous people get into ridiculous conflicts with one another for no discernible reason. The pettier, the better.

And these beefs are rendered even more appealing when they are between two figures who have no apparent connection. Sure, the beefs between musicians or athletes or whatever are fun, because they’re coming at it from a place of shared perspective. But it’s the beefs that make no sense at all that are the best of all. There’s nothing better than two famous people whose orbits simply don’t intersect, whose Venn diagram is just two circles, getting into it.

Granted, those sorts of beefs are relatively rare, which makes them all the more precious when they do turn up. And sometimes you get a beef that is legitimately weird, the sort of feud that feels like it was created via Mad Libs.

A beef like that between Mark Wahlberg and Dr. Oz. Oh yeah – it’s a thing.

Wednesday, 22 January 2020 13:39

Weird National Briefs (01/22/2020)

Written by Allen Adams

Right in the bofa

PROVIDENCE, R.I. - A Rhode Island man accidentally shot himself in the scrotum while sitting on his bed, police said.

Providence police officers found Edward Martinez, 22, in a hallway wearing no pants with a gunshot wound to his scrotum Thursday night, said Commander Thomas Verdi.

Martinez told police he took his pants off after he fired the gun and located the wound, the Providence Journal reported. He was taken to Rhode Island Hospital with non-life-threatening injuries.

Police seized three guns that were found inside Martinez’s bedroom, including a semi-automatic pistol on his bedside table. He isn’t facing any criminal charges at this time, Verdi said.

TME – This story is nuts!

Wednesday, 15 January 2020 13:30

Celebrity Slam - Hood hopping with Julian Edelman

Written by Allen Adams

Based as we are here in Maine, it probably comes as no surprise that the folks at Celebrity Slam are big fans of the NFL’s New England Patriots. We’re homers to the core, we are.

That means that we’ve really been able to enjoy the unprecedented success of the past two decades. One could argue that no other team has been as consistently successful for as long in the history of the NFL.

But even consistent success doesn’t mean winning a title every year. And this year was one of the non-title seasons, with the Patriots falling to the Tennessee Titans in the wild card round of the NFL playoffs. It’s the earliest end to a New England football season in a decade. So what are the Patriots players doing with their spare time?

Let’s ask Julian Edelman.

The star wide receiver for the Patriots landed in a little bit of hot water over the weekend after getting arrested following an incident that allegedly involved him jumping onto the hood of a car.

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