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Wednesday, 22 January 2020 13:40

Celebrity Slam - Beef: It’s what’s for breakfast

Written by Allen Adams

It’s no secret that we here at Celebrity Slam love beef. We are never happier than when we have the opportunity to dig into some Grade-A prime cut celebrity beef. We love it when famous people get into ridiculous conflicts with one another for no discernible reason. The pettier, the better.

And these beefs are rendered even more appealing when they are between two figures who have no apparent connection. Sure, the beefs between musicians or athletes or whatever are fun, because they’re coming at it from a place of shared perspective. But it’s the beefs that make no sense at all that are the best of all. There’s nothing better than two famous people whose orbits simply don’t intersect, whose Venn diagram is just two circles, getting into it.

Granted, those sorts of beefs are relatively rare, which makes them all the more precious when they do turn up. And sometimes you get a beef that is legitimately weird, the sort of feud that feels like it was created via Mad Libs.

A beef like that between Mark Wahlberg and Dr. Oz. Oh yeah – it’s a thing.

Wednesday, 22 January 2020 13:39

Weird National Briefs (01/22/2020)

Written by Allen Adams

Right in the bofa

PROVIDENCE, R.I. - A Rhode Island man accidentally shot himself in the scrotum while sitting on his bed, police said.

Providence police officers found Edward Martinez, 22, in a hallway wearing no pants with a gunshot wound to his scrotum Thursday night, said Commander Thomas Verdi.

Martinez told police he took his pants off after he fired the gun and located the wound, the Providence Journal reported. He was taken to Rhode Island Hospital with non-life-threatening injuries.

Police seized three guns that were found inside Martinez’s bedroom, including a semi-automatic pistol on his bedside table. He isn’t facing any criminal charges at this time, Verdi said.

TME – This story is nuts!

Wednesday, 15 January 2020 13:30

Celebrity Slam - Hood hopping with Julian Edelman

Written by Allen Adams

Based as we are here in Maine, it probably comes as no surprise that the folks at Celebrity Slam are big fans of the NFL’s New England Patriots. We’re homers to the core, we are.

That means that we’ve really been able to enjoy the unprecedented success of the past two decades. One could argue that no other team has been as consistently successful for as long in the history of the NFL.

But even consistent success doesn’t mean winning a title every year. And this year was one of the non-title seasons, with the Patriots falling to the Tennessee Titans in the wild card round of the NFL playoffs. It’s the earliest end to a New England football season in a decade. So what are the Patriots players doing with their spare time?

Let’s ask Julian Edelman.

The star wide receiver for the Patriots landed in a little bit of hot water over the weekend after getting arrested following an incident that allegedly involved him jumping onto the hood of a car.

Wednesday, 15 January 2020 13:28

Weird National Briefs (01/15/2020)

Written by Allen Adams

Hairy hold-up

CHARLOTTE, N.C. - The FBI is asking the public's help in catching a so-called “bad wig bandit” who's been robbing banks in North Carolina.

The FBI said in a statement on Thursday that the suspect wore a different wig during each heist in the Charlotte area.

One wig was blonde. Another was black. The third was red.

The FBI said he robbed a BB&T in Huntersville on Dec. 13. He then robbed two banks on Jan. 7. The first was a New Horizon Bank in Belmont. The second was a Wells Fargo in Gastonia.

TME – The challenges on “RuPaul’s Drag Race” are getting INTENSE.

Tuesday, 07 January 2020 12:00

Celebrity Slam - From 'Full House' to the big house

Written by Allen Adams

With a new year, you can expect some new names and faces here at Celebrity Slam. Part of the joy of the year is slowly learning who the big weirdo and/or a-hole is going to be. Sometimes, they come in hot and heavy. Other times, it’s a slow build. Either way, it’s someone new.

But just because we’re in a new year and awaiting the Biggest D-Bag of 2020’s coming out party doesn’t mean that we’re no longer going to look back at the delightful idiocy that we got to enjoy in 2019.

This week, we’re going to continue a story from last year. A favorite story, actually. We’re going to talk about the still-exquisitely named law enforcement operation Varsity Blues, in which numerous people – including actors Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin – were caught committing various levels of crime in an effort to ensure college admission for their jerk kids.

The fallout has been real. Huffman already went to jail, serving 11 days of a two-week sentence. But Loughlin, whose efforts were considerably more involved than Huffman’s, is looking at a much bleaker potential sentence. If things don’t go her way, she could be looking at two or three years in for-real prison. That’s no joke, but what she’s doing in advance of that possibility kind of sounds like one.

You see, Loughlin has reportedly hired a prison consultant.

Tuesday, 07 January 2020 11:59

Weird National Briefs (01/08/2020)

Written by Allen Adams

Bird is the word

LAKE WORTH BEACH, Fla. - When someone in a Florida neighborhood heard chilling cries and the words “Let me out!” they dialed 911.

Little did they know the cries were that of a 40-year-old parrot named Rambo.

After the call, four Palm Beach County Sheriff’s deputies pulled up and questioned a man who appeared to be repairing a car in his driveway. The Palm Beach Post reports that when the deputies explained their concerns, the man smiled, then told deputies he’d introduce them to the perpetrator. When he returned with the parrot, the deputies burst out laughing.

The man told officers that he taught Rambo to scream “Let me out!” when he was a kid and Rambo lived in a cage.

PBSO officials could not be reached for more details. The agency did tweet a link to a video Saturday, saying, “Our deputies in Lake Worth Beach came to the help of someone screaming for help. Hilarity ensued.”

TME – Fowl play is suspected.

Monday, 23 December 2019 21:41

Celebrity Slam - 2019 Year in Review

Written by Allen Adams

One of the things that we love to do as every year comes to a close is take a look back on everything that we addressed in this space over the past 12 months. It’s a chance to say good-bye to the year’s wackiness and weirdness of the celebrity sphere. Some of it good, some of it bad … and a whole lot of it just plain dumb.

Let’s take a minute to look back at just a few of the highlights (or lowlights) from Celebrity Slam 2019.

Monday, 23 December 2019 21:39

Weird National Briefs (12/25/2019)

Written by Allen Adams

Owl be home for Christmas

ATLANTA - A Georgia family got a real hoot from its Christmas tree: More than a week after they bought it, they discovered a live owl nestled among its branches.

Katie McBride Newman said Friday that she and her daughter spotted the bird on Dec. 12. They had bought the 10-foot (3-meter) tall tree from a Home Depot, brought it back to their Atlanta area home and decorated it with lights and, coincidentally, owl ornaments.

“It was surreal, but we weren’t really freaked out about it,” McBride Newman said. “We’re really outdoorsy people. We love the wilderness.”

The family opened windows and doors near the tree hoping the owl would fly away, but it didn’t.

“The owl seemed to be pretty comfortable, and I thought, ‘Hey buddy, it’s not going to go well if you just stay here. There’s no food, I’m sorry,’” said McBride Newman’s husband, Billy Newman.

So the family called a nonprofit nature center for help. The Chattahoochee Nature Center caught the bird and helped the family release it.

McBride Newman said she believed the bird had been in the tree since they bought it, but was hidden.

“We think he was just in there hugging the trunk,” she said. “It’s a very dense tree and it was very fresh. That’s why we picked it.”

TME – Whoooo cares?

Tuesday, 17 December 2019 12:48

Celebrity Slam - Big Derulo Energy

Written by Allen Adams

Celebrities are always saying and/or doing dumb and/or weird stuff. It’s part of the package for a lot of these folks, and for whatever reason, their method of coping with fame involves losing track of what it means to interact with others like a normal human.

Now, most of the dumbness/weirdness is fairly predictable. Silly social media beefs. “Don’t you know who I am?” moments. General awkwardness brought about by a lack of self-awareness. The usual business.

But every once in a while, a celebrity gets weird in public about something unexpected. Something that you’d never in a million years consider discussing in a small group of strangers, let alone sharing with the world. Something … different.

So – we need to talk about Jason Derulo’s penis.

Tuesday, 17 December 2019 12:46

Weird National Briefs (12/18/2019)

Written by Allen Adams

Forever fruitcake

TECUMSEH, Mich. - Some families pass down jewelry, watches or even recipes. But a Michigan family has its own heirloom: a 141-year-old fruitcake.

“It’s a great thing,” said Julie Ruttinger, the great great granddaughter of Fidelia Ford, who baked the cake in 1878. “It was tradition. It’s a legacy.”

The cake was initially preserved to honor Ford. She established a tradition of baking the cake and letting it age for a year before serving it during holiday seasons. Ford died at age 65 before her 1878 cake could be eaten, and by the time the holidays arrived, the family considered her handiwork a legacy, not food.

Until his 2013 death, the cake was in the care of Ruttinger’s father, Morgan Ford, who was Fidelia Ford’s great-grandson. He had stored it in an antique glass dish on the top shelf of a china cabinet in his Tecumseh home _ which is where it remains today.

“He took care of it to the day he left the earth,” Ruttinger said. “We knew it meant a lot to him.”

Guinness World Records doesn’t have an entry for the oldest fruitcake, but as for cakes in general, the Ford fruitcake is nowhere near the world’s oldest, The Detroit News reported. That honor goes to a 4,176-year-old cake that was found in an Egyptian tomb, according to the Guinness organization. It is on display in a food museum in Switzerland.

TME – This story really takes the cake.

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