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Celebrity Slam (408)

Tuesday, 23 October 2018 16:55

Celebrity Slam - Suck my ... spit?

Written by Allen Adams

We try our best to be equal opportunists here are Celebrity Slam. While we obviously focus on the worlds of music, film and television to find the famous folks we adoringly scorn, we’re not wedded to those particular realms. We aren’t “Movie Star Slam” or “Hip-Hop Star Slam” – we’re Celebrity Slam. And there are other celebrities out there.

Specifically, we’re talking about the world of sports. There are professional athletes out there – quite a few of them, actually – whose levels of global fame are as high as any A-lister. Some manage to get even higher. So when they commit a foul, we’re certainly going to call it.

And when a sports scuffle suddenly involves another non-athlete celebrity? Well, then that’s just a delicious Celebrity Slam sundae.

Tuesday, 16 October 2018 17:31

Magical beef from Azealia Banks

Written by Allen Adams

There are some weeks when it can be a little difficult to come up with a really solid entry for Celebrity Slam. There’s just no way of knowing whether we’re going to get the good stuff or have to settle for the merely OK in any given week. Sometimes, we’re left struggling to find something – anything – to fill this space.

Friends, this is not one of those weeks.

Believe it or not, we aren’t talking about the breakup of Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson. Ordinarily, something as pop culturally present as the end of Pariana would be a no-brainer for us. We love breaking down the breaking apart of romantic celebrity portmanteaus almost as much as we love coining them in the first place. And yet – not this week. Why?

Because Azealia Banks and Lana Del Rey are going at it and things are getting WEIRD.

Wednesday, 10 October 2018 11:35

Celebrity Slam - Katt's dog disaster

Written by Allen Adams

In recent weeks, we’ve found ourselves revisiting the same handful of celebrities here at Celebrity Slam. It’s almost a throwback to the Golden Age, when we could reasonably count on Lindsay Lohan and Justin Bieber to just trade off doing stupid crap or simply cycle through Kardashians.

Granted, no one that we’re dealing with has quite ascended to that pantheon. However, we have a couple who have certainly made their cases. And honestly, in terms of sheer Celebrity Slam value – we’re talking per-Slam numbers – a couple of these recent celebs have made a reasonable case for enshrinement.

This brings us to this week’s repeat customer, comedian Katt Williams.

Wednesday, 03 October 2018 11:57

Celebrity Slam - More Cardi B-eef

Written by Allen Adams

It’s no secret that we have our favorites here at Celebrity Slam. Certain famous folks have given us consistent nonsense over an extended period of time; there’s something wonderful about that sense of reliability, of knowing that you’ll always be able to back to that well. Others are like shooting stars, streaking across the sky in a spectacular display of lunatic behavior that burns out too quickly, but is an utter delight while it still shines.

This week, we’ll be discussing someone who falls into that latter category.

Cardi B was featured in this space just a couple of weeks ago thanks to a shoe-throwing altercation with Nicki Minaj during New York Fashion Week. It was the sort of story that we love here, the bubbling over of a long-simmering beef that just happened to take place in a glaringly public place. It was ridiculous and dumb and we were so very happy.

And yet … Cardi B may have outdone herself with her latest antics.

Wednesday, 26 September 2018 11:46

Celebrity Slam - Katt scratch fever

Written by Allen Adams

It’s funny – while we here at Celebrity Slam have always thrived on the consumption of beef, it seems as though we’ve gotten a particularly high grade of famous feuding recently. For whatever reason, our favorite celebs are really going at one another, finding more and weirder ways to get under one another’s skins.

Our latest installment in 2018’s Beef-O-Rama is the current battle between comedian Katt Williams and, well, actually a bunch of people, but the biggest beef is with Tiffany Haddish.

Wednesday, 19 September 2018 10:59

Celebrity Slam - Bieber/Baldwin nuptial nonsense

Written by Allen Adams

Those who follow Celebrity Slam with any regularity know that our love of celebrity couples (and by extension making up portmanteaus for them) is outstripped only by our love for mocking and deriding famous people who say and/or do stupid things.

However, every once in a while, we are blessed with a rare opportunity to bring our two loves together. Sometimes, it’s a celebrity couple doing or saying the stupid thing. Even less frequently, however, is when the celebrity couple is forced to deal with the dumb stuff being said by people outside of the relationship.

Guess what we’ve got this week?

Wednesday, 12 September 2018 10:57

Celebrity Slam - Cardi B-eef

Written by Allen Adams

That’s right, friends – beef is on the menu.

Wednesday, 05 September 2018 10:12

Celebrity Slam - Don't shame the hustle

Written by Allen Adams

This is not going to be the usual Celebrity Slam.

Ordinarily, we take to this space to scorn and mock those in the celebrity sphere who say and/or do things that we consider worthy of our scorn and mockery (and yes, we do power couple portmanteaus and occasional heartfelt goodbyes, but the majority of our time is spent on the aforementioned scorning and mocking).

Here’s the thing – ultimately, it’s all in good fun. It’s rare that we genuinely take anybody to task for what they’ve said and done. We make fun of them for being out-of-touch idiots, but it’s little more than teasing. Like, we don’t ACTUALLY care about whatever dips—t move got pulled by Bieber or a Kardashian. It’s just fun to make fun.

But sometimes we see a story that, while it might resemble what we do on a very surface level, is actually little more than mean-spirited shaming, intended to belittle someone who has done absolutely nothing wrong.

So yeah – we’re going to talk about Geoffrey Owens for a minute.

Friday, 31 August 2018 09:05

Celebrity Slam - Farewell to Neil Simon

Written by Allen Adams

Regular readers of this space know that sometimes, I take a break from the usual blend of snotty snark and celebrity portmanteaus to talk about something real. Usually, that break comes when a famous person who has had some sort of impact on me personally.

This is one of those times.

Neil Simon, the legendary playwright, passed away on August 26 at the age of 91. He was one of the most prolific – and most important – writers of the 20th century. His work helped define the theater for half-a-century; he is behind some of the most beloved stage comedies of all time.

Thursday, 23 August 2018 13:26

Celebrity Slam - The Smashening

Written by Allen Adams
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