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Celebrity Slam - Katt's dog disaster

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In recent weeks, we’ve found ourselves revisiting the same handful of celebrities here at Celebrity Slam. It’s almost a throwback to the Golden Age, when we could reasonably count on Lindsay Lohan and Justin Bieber to just trade off doing stupid crap or simply cycle through Kardashians.

Granted, no one that we’re dealing with has quite ascended to that pantheon. However, we have a couple who have certainly made their cases. And honestly, in terms of sheer Celebrity Slam value – we’re talking per-Slam numbers – a couple of these recent celebs have made a reasonable case for enshrinement.

This brings us to this week’s repeat customer, comedian Katt Williams.

Why is Katt Williams in the spotlight this time? Glad you asked. See, Williams was in Portland, Oregon last week, ostensibly to take part in Nick Cannon’s “Wild ‘N Out Live” concert tour. However, he never made it to the venue because he got into a fight with his driver.

According to reports, Williams got into it with the driver of the town car over a dispute regarding the transportation of the comedian’s dog. The argument led to a physical attack; the driver reportedly sustained minor injuries to the face – cuts and swelling – and was treated at a nearby hospital. Williams left the scene in another vehicle. Fast forward to Saturday morning. Officers investigating the incident locate and arrest Williams.

Now, getting into a fight with a driver over whether or not your dog can ride in the car is quality Celebrity Slam material. Getting arrested and going to jail for it is even better. But when that arrest leads to a longer stay in jail because of an outstanding felony warrant?

Magnificent.

And believe it or not, it somehow gets even better. See, the outstanding warrant is because Williams missed a court date in Atlanta. He missed the date because he was on his way to the Emmy Awards ceremony – and his management team DIDN’T TELL HIM ABOUT THE WARRANT. Yes, he was nominated for his work on the FX show “Atlanta.” And yes, he wound up winning. But Williams says that if he had known about the situation, he absolutely would have been in that courtroom. According to him, he didn’t even know about the warrant until it came up following this most recent incident.

So good.

First things first – let’s all agree that maybe Katt Williams should steer clear of the Pacific Northwest from here on in. There’s this incident, of course, but then there was also the incredible idiocy in Seattle a while back where he slapped a dude at a Target store and then led cops on a low-speed chase while riding a motorized tricycle.

Also, doesn’t it feel like we’re missing multiple steps to this story? Like, did he go straight from “Your dog can’t be in here” to slap-fighting? With almost anyone else, you’d wonder, but with Katt Williams, you’re unsurprised that he might go from zero to punching in four seconds flat.

(See what we mean about per-Slam numbers? Katt Williams can fill it up in limited minutes, is what we’re saying.)

Oh, and you’re probably going to want to find new representation. Not that it’s any of our business, but if your team is willing to hide this sort of thing from you, you have to wonder what else they might be capable of. Might be time to take a good look at your bank statements and then consider hiring someone who isn’t related to you to handle your business. At the very least, find someone whose decisions won’t actively increase your likelihood of spending the weekend in a Portland jail.

And all this takes place just a few weeks after Williams went after fellow comedians like Tiffany Haddish for not being funny or whatever. Say what you will, man, but funny or not, she’s not the one pitching a fit because her dog can’t ride in the limo. She’s not the one whose manager jeopardized her freedom for a quick Emmy boost. And she’s not the one sitting in jail waiting to be extradited.

It just goes to show, dogs are always going to be a source of trouble when you’re a Katt.

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