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Celebrity Slam - July 24, 2013

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Meanwhile, in the West

In case you haven't heard, Kanye West doesn't like the paparazzi. Like, really doesn't like them. He has made his displeasure known very vocally on a number of occasions recently. Long story short, he's not a fan.

Unfortunately, Mr. West took things a little too far and went to the realm of the physical.

It all went down at LAX on Friday. According to reports, Kanye was passing through a group of photographers and turned to address one of them, saying 'What you're trying to do is get me in trouble, so I step out and have to pay you like $250,000.' Apparently, he convinced himself that it was worth it, because he then ran toward the photographer and attempted to grab the camera, both men sinking to the ground.

The photographer reported the incident to police before being transported to a hospital for medical attention. The photographer also reportedly wants to press charges; the police are referring the case to the district attorney's office as a felony attempted robbery.

Oh Kanye. You stupid, stupid man.

You have to know that you can't, absolutely cannot put your hands on any of these guys. You've made your feelings about them clear, and they're understandable. You want a moment's peace from the flashbulbs it makes sense. Unfortunately, you live in a world where if they want to take your picture in the airport, they can do that. It's probably infuriating, but that's the way it is.

And for you to actually acknowledge that you felt baited into a confrontation immediately before engaging in said confrontation? That just shows you to be either incredibly impulsive or flat-out dumb. You had to know that no matter what happened, that guy was going to do his best to punish you for it. You know they're scumbags, man why would you engage on that level?

And just for future reference attacking a cameraman is rarely the right answer.

One weird week

Things just keep getting crazier when it comes to Amanda Bynes. The actress/erstwhile rapper/ongoing trainwreck has been getting up to more lunacy than ever lately. 

It started when Bynes wreaked havoc on a Ritz-Carlton in New York City last week. It started from the get-go. Bynes apparently took umbrage with the front desk clerk, telling the woman that she was 'too ugly' to check her in and offering the services of her plastic surgeon, reducing the clerk to tears. According to hotel staff, Bynes then proceeded to smoke pot in her room every day while she was there, despite repeated warnings to abstain. 

It got so bad that the hotel reportedly booted her from the premises several hours before her scheduled checkout. For her part, Bynes insists that there was no weed smoking and that she left the hotel voluntarily.

Sure she did.

But the weirdness came to a head in California. Authorities were called to a Thousand Oaks retirement community when an allegedly drunk Bynes tried to get in, but was turned away as a trespasser. They did call her a cab, but she quickly got kicked out of it when she told the driver that she didn't have any money. She then returned to the retirement community, which is when authorities were called.

The very next night, the fire department responded to a report at a different Thousand Oaks home where they found Bynes standing next to a small fire that she apparently built in the home's driveway. The sheriff's department was called and after questioning Bynes, they took her into custody.

It has been a while since we've been subjected to a full-on celebrity meltdown. Britney Spears gave us a good one a few years back and we actually had to institute a Lindsay Lohan moratorium in this space due to all the crap she got up to, but there hasn't really been anyone else up to their level. Until now.

How has no one reined this woman in yet? She's behaving like an absolute lunatic. Insulting hotel workers? Breaking into retirement communities? Setting fires in random driveways? It's like she's trying to fill out some sort of nutjob bingo card. It's the kind of quickly escalating crazy that defies analysis; this is clearly a woman who is capable of anything at any time.

It's hard to think of a recent celebrity week that was anywhere close to this one in terms of sheer weirdness. While we certainly enjoy the insanity of building a random driveway campfire, you have to hope that this is the zenith (or nadir) of the Bynes Batst Bell Curve.

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