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Weird National Briefs - January 8th, 2014

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The right to bear arms

GLENSHAW, Pa. - A western Pennsylvania police chief is befuddled by someone who foolishly jumped in front of a car while wearing a bear costume during a snow storm.

Shaler Township Chief Bryan Kelly tells the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review that nobody was hurt during the stunt, which occurred about 1:30 a.m. Friday in this suburb about five miles east of Pittsburgh.

Kelly says the bear-suited person jumped in front of the car at an intersection, then ran down an alley. Police showed up to investigate, but couldn't track the suspect.

The area received about four inches of snow overnight, which only made the prank more dangerous.

The chief says he could understand the incident a little better 'if it was April. ... I could see it as an April Fool's thing.'

TME Still no word on whether the suspect pooped in the woods.

On the prowl

BRUNSWICK, Ga. - Workers at a historic planation in south Georgia are using cougar urine to scare off feral hogs that have rooted grass and damaged a nature trail.

The manager of the historic Hofwyl-Broadfield Plantation, Bill Giles, said he was initially skeptical after getting advice to use the urine to ward off hogs.

But the hogs appeared to go away after he spread the powdered urine around sites that he wanted to protect.

Giles told the Florida Times-Union that he cannot spread enough to protect the entire 1,200-acre property. He instead focuses on protecting high-visibility areas around the plantation house, barns and other buildings.

TME Collecting urine from hot-to-trot middle-aged ladies must be difficult.

That escalated quickly

DES MOINES, Iowa - Police say an Iowa man was arrested after he pulled a knife on his brother during a fight over peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

The Des Moines Register reports that Jerome Davis was arrested on Friday after the confrontation with his brother in their Des Moines home. Both men are in their 50s.

Davis' accuser told police he was angry because he believed his brother was eating too many peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Davis allegedly made three sandwiches and ate them in their living room, and made another less than an hour later.

A police report says the brothers began to argue about laziness and over-eating. Davis allegedly pulled out a folding knife and held it his brother's face.

Davis was charged with domestic abuse with a weapon.

TME Apparently, he wasn't ready for that jelly.

Candy caper

HESPERIA, Calif. - For a pair of thwarted Southern California thieves, taking candy from a well-alarmed warehouse proved a lot harder than taking it from a baby.

Video surveillance captured the would-be candy swipers as they approached Candy Crate's warehouse in Hesperia on Friday. The men broke a window and fled.

The company sells retro sweets like candy cigarettes and Astro Pops.

Candy Crate operations manager Randi Caporale tells the Victorville Daily Press an alarm went off that likely scared away the thieves, and 'not even a Blow Pop' was taken.

Caporale says the warehouse is 'in the middle of nowhere, so maybe they thought they'd come in and get their candy on.'

The facility is open to the public, but the company sells most of its candy online, so little cash is on hand.

TME Parting (without candy) is such sweet sorrow

Bup jIH!

INDIAN TRAIL, N.C. - Call it a politician boldly going where no one has gone before.

On Thursday, David Waddell used the Klingon language to write his letter of resignation from the Indian Trail Town Council in North Carolina.

Waddell says he opted to use Klingon, the language of a warrior race on the 'Star Trek' TV shows and movies, as an inside joke. Mayor Michael Alvarez is calling the letter unprofessional.

Waddell says he is resigning at the end of this month. His four-year term expires in December 2015.

Waddell says he also needs to devote time to mounting a write-in campaign on the Constitution Party's platform against U.S. Sen. Kay Hagan.

TME Of course, his resume is in Romulan.

Can't beat beets!

BUTLER, Pa. - The Pennsylvania Department of Transportation is experimenting with beet juice as a way to treat icy roads in especially cold weather.

PennDOT officials tell KDKA-TV that chemicals in the juice are supposed to help road salt melt ice at lower temperatures. Typically, salt loses much of its effectiveness below 20 degrees, but when mixed with beet juice, the salt reportedly melts ice down to zero or even below-zero temperatures.

PennDOT experimented with beet juice a few years ago but officials say a new and improved version is being tested as part of a pilot program in Butler County, about 20 miles north of Pittsburgh.

The new beet juice has more sugar in it, which is supposed to improve its performance.

TME In related news, author Tom Robbins is moving to western Pennsylvania.

Last modified on Wednesday, 09 April 2014 19:03

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