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Weird National Briefs - January 15th, 2014

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Barking bad

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. (AP) _ A New Mexico woman whose dog tested positive for cocaine and marijuana is fighting to get the canine back after surrendering the Labrador retriever because of a $2,000 vet bill.

The Albuquerque Journal reports 1-year-old Maddie showed 'strong positive cocaine' and active marijuana traces in urine tests conducted this week by an Albuquerque clinic.

A clinic report says veterinarians saw the dog twitching, shaking and walking with poor balance after owner Arlene Saiz brought her in.

The report says because Saiz couldn't pay the vet bill, she signed the dog over to the city Animal Welfare Department.

Saiz says she regrets the decision.

City officials said police found no evidence to file charges against Saiz, who said she doesn't know how the animal consumed the drugs.

TME There was no comment from Maddie's attorney, a Mr. Saul Goodman.

Clean and (un)sober

ALTOONA, Pa. - Authorities say a man stole 12 bottles of hand sanitizer from a central Pennsylvania hospital so he could mix it with orange juice and drink it for the alcohol it contained.

The Altoona Mirror reports 51-year-old Lee Ammerman has been mailed a summons requiring him to surrender Feb. 5 on charges of theft and receiving stolen property.

Police say an employee at UPMC Altoona hospital saw Ammerman steal a bottle of sanitizer in October by hiding it in an arm sling he was wearing. They say Ammerman returned to steal more sanitizer twice in December.

Police say they confronted Ammerman, who acknowledged stealing the sanitizer, saying, 'I mix the liquid with orange juice.'

The hospital is seeking about $80 in restitution.

Ammerman doesn't have a listed phone or an attorney named in court records.

TME His throw-up kills 99.99% of bacteria.

Beery blaze

HOUSTON - An off-duty Houston firefighter made the best of his resources when trying to put out a truck tire fire: He used beer the rig was hauling.

Fire Capt. Craig Moreau and his wife were driving home Monday night after a trip to Austin when they came upon an 18-wheeler on fire. Moreau and the trucker, whose brake problems started the fire, tried using a small extinguisher.

Moreau says he thought the fire was out, but then noticed the blaze had flared up after crawling under the truck to check.

The firefighter then asked the driver what he was hauling. When he learned it was beer, he had his solution.

Both men began shaking and spraying cans of beer on the blaze, and the fire went out.

No injuries were reported.

TME That fire got, like, SO wasted.

Going bananas

NEWINGTON, Conn. - Call it the case of the banana-eating bandit.

Police in Connecticut say they're looking for a man who smashed his vehicle into a gas station in Newington, swiped a banana from a shelf and ate it before leaving early Wednesday morning. Nothing else was taken.

The store's surveillance video shows a Ford Freestyle with Connecticut license plates backing repeatedly into the store and breaking the glass doors, which set off the burglar alarm at about 2 a.m.

The man was gone before police arrived.

Authorities describe him as a black man who was wearing a brown hat, dark jacket and dark pants. Police say the station wagon has damage to the driver's side taillight and rear bumper.

TME Even if he gets caught, he'll probably get off on appeal.

Here I go again

GLOUCESTER, Mass. - He wasn't asked to play a few licks on the drums, but police in Gloucester quickly determined that the homeless man they found at a city business wasn't who claimed to be.

When officers responded to the business Thursday to assist employees with the man, he claimed he was the drummer for the 1980s-era hard rock band Whitesnake. 

The Gloucester Times reports that a quick check of records indicated that that was not true.

The man, who had no known address, had been asked to leave an apartment building earlier in the night when he was found sleeping in the doorway.

The unnamed man was taken to a hospital for evaluation.

TME Ironically, it turns out he was actually the drummer for Skid Row.

Signs, signs

DENVER - Colorado officials think a difference of one-hundredth of a mile will be enough to stop thieves from stealing the mile marker 420 sign along Interstate 70.

Amy Ford of the Colorado Department of Transportation says the 'MILE 420' sign near Stratton was stolen for the last time sometime in the last year, and officials replaced it with a sign that says 'MILE 419.99.'

Ford says it's the only '420' sign to be replaced in the state that recently legalized recreational marijuana. Most highways aren't long enough to need one.

The number '420' has long been associated with marijuana, though its origins as a shorthand for pot are murky.

Mile 419.99, about 25 miles from the Kansas border, isn't the only place in Colorado with a fractional mile marker. Cameron Pass in Larimer County has a 'MILE 68.5' sign after frequent thefts of the 'MILE 69' sign.

TME Where there's a weed, there's a way.

Last modified on Wednesday, 09 April 2014 19:03

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