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October 31, 2012

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Three times a lady

MADISON, Wis. - A Verona woman has been cited for drunken driving after the 21-year-old allegedly caused three crashes in less than three hours.

Authorities say the woman acknowledged being responsible for all three collisions in Dane and Green Counties. She was cited for causing injury by driving while intoxicated. A Wisconsin State Journal report says she wasn't taken to jail.

Deputies say the collisions happened Friday between about 1 p.m. and 4 p.m.

In one case the woman allegedly sideswiped another vehicle's side-view mirror after the other driver swerved to avoid a head-on collision. In another case, the woman allegedly crossed into oncoming traffic and collided with another vehicle, causing minor injuries to one person.

In the third case, the woman allegedly ran into a ditch but left before authorities arrived.

TME Drunk driving is never okay, but you have to admire her commitment to the craft.

The Prisoner Tree

MONTGOMERY, Pa. - An inmate is back behind bars after authorities said he took off while on work release in central Pennsylvania.

Police say 18-year-old Eugene Harris walked away from Lycoming County Resource Management Services around 8 a.m. Friday.

WNEP-TV reports Harris was sorting recyclables as part of a work release program from the county prison. He was locked up on forgery and theft charges.

The man was found about a mile away at the White Deer Golf Course in Clinton Township.

Police said he was found hiding in a tree on the golf course. Investigators used a ladder truck to get to him.

TME When life gives you felons, make felonade.

The Lone Re-arranger

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. - A family says an unwelcome visitor keeps striking their Albuquerque home with an unusually goal - to re-arrange their patio furniture.

KOB-TV reports that the unknown woman enters onto the family's property to change things around for some peculiar reason. Surveillance footage shows her walking up to the front porch early in the morning and moving around the family's patio furniture.

Angela Dentandt says at first she thought that her daughter was moving the furniture until she saw the video. She says after each clandestine re-arranging she puts the furniture back in its original place.

Dentandt's husband, Carl, says it appears that the woman is on some mission.

If another there's another unsolicited furniture move, the family says they may press charges.

TME They take their feng shui seriously in Albequerque.

Monkey mastermind

ST. PETERSBURG, Fla. - A wild monkey that bit a woman and was on the lam in St. Petersburg, Florida, for two years has been captured.

Authorities say a wildlife official shot the monkey with a tranquilizer dart Wednesday. The monkey then went into the woods and trappers were able to grab it. He was taken to an animal hospital for a checkup.

The monkey eluded capture for years as it roamed neighborhoods. It even has a Facebook page and most recently bit a woman, causing trappers to ramp up their efforts to capture him.

Animal trapper Vernan Yates had been hired by the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservative Commission to catch the rhesus macaque. It wasn't immediately known if he was with wildlife officials when the monkey was captured.

TME He's a criminal folk hero like Dillinger or Robin Hood, just with biting and poop-flinging.

An absentee accident

BEAVER FALLS, Pa. - Police don't plan to cite the drivers of a truck and school bus which crashed in western Pennsylvania.

But only because neither vehicle had a driver when they wrecked.

Police in Patterson Township tell the Beaver County Times the incident happened just before 10 a.m. Tuesday when the parked bus began to roll down a hill. Police aren't sure why that happened, because the driver had engaged the parking brake.

The bus rear-ended a parked truck, which also began rolling down the hill alongside the bus, until the truck flipped onto its side. The bus continued on, shearing off one utility pole and hitting another before rolling to a stop a few feet from the porch of a home.

Nobody was hurt.

Patterson Township is about 30 miles northwest of Pittsburgh.

TME Clearly, the driving standards for ghosts in Pennsylvania need to be raised.

One gun, one vote

SMYRNA, Ga. - A promotion urging Georgians to vote and offering the chance to win a gun has created a barrage of controversy in Atlanta's suburbs.

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution reports that Adventure Outdoors owner Jay Wallace defends the raffle.

Democratic State Sen. Vincent Fort of Atlanta filed a complaint Tuesday with the Secretary of State's office. Fort says the promotion violates state law prohibiting anyone from offering money or gifts in exchange for voting or registering to vote.

Eight billboards in metro Atlanta advise people to bring in their Georgia voter sticker for a chance to win a Glock handgun or Browning rifle.

Wallace says the raffle at his store in Smyrna is open to all customers -- not just voters. He says the promotion is getting people involved in the political process.

TME Good thing politics never makes anyone angry or irrational.

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