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Celebrity Slam - A pair of celebrity portmanteaux

April 27, 2021
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Anyone who follows this space with any regularity knows that one of our favorite things to do is come up with portmanteaux for celebrity relationships. Now, we’re not necessarily worried about longevity of romance – does anyone really remember the ill-fated Hiddleswift experience from a few years ago? – but we do love the idea of famous people falling for one another.

Now, it’s always wonderful when we get an opportunity to do what we do for a star-studded hookup, but this week, we’re going to be taking things to the next level: TWO star-studded hookups!

That’s right, folks – we’ve got a pair of burgeoning celebrity romances upon which to bestow cutesy name-combining titles. It ain’t Christmas, but it’s close!

First, let’s talk about the nascent relationship between “SNL” star Pete Davidson and “Bridgerton” actress Phoebe Dynevor. Now, we’ve come to terms with the fact that we are never going to understand what exactly attracts people to the strange-looking and off-putting Davidson (we’ve heard unsavory rumors alluding to a certain kind of “big (blank) energy,” but we’ve been unable to confirm), but this seems like a particularly weird match.

Dynevor – who played Daphne on the hit streaming series – and Davidson have been an item for a few weeks, with rumors starting to bubble when Davidson turned up in Manchester, where Dyenvor has been living with her mother during the pandemic. But it’s only recently that the pair have appeared in public and confirmed the status of their relationship.

So what do we call them?

It’s a deceptive pairing, one that appears to have more options than it actually does. We spent a fair amount of time trying various combos, but try as we might, we couldn’t make “Dyneson” or “Davidor” work. And then, like a bolt from the blue, it hit us. We didn’t need to try so hard when the answer was staring us right in the face. Rather than going full portmanteau, we could simply use the initials that the two share – PD – and go from there. When we then considered Davidson’s noted proclivity for displaying his affection for his famous ladyfriends in public, we had it.

Pete Davidson + Phoebe Dynevor = PDA. We love it, though we’ll understand if you think it is a Bridge(rton) too far.

Next, we’re going to go with the newly-bubbling love story that’s happening between musician Travis Barker and noted famous sibling Kourtney Kardashian. There’s a lot to enjoy about this pairing – most notably the surface-level unlikeliness of it all – and so we’re greatly looking forward to sharing our newly developed portmanteau with you.

The two have become quite an item, with all manner of totally-not-planned photos of the pair making out on beaches and stuff making their way into the public eye. It’s still a young romance, but when it comes to these folks, you never know how long something is going to last.

Now, this is an unconventional matchup as well (though it sometimes does seem as if the Kardashian sisters have a bit of a type). So we’re going to go with an unconventional portmanteau.

Usually, we try to pair first names or last names, in an effort to maintain a bit of symmetry. Occasionally, circumstances force us to mix and match – the recently-dissolved J-Rod is a perfect example. But with something like this, we’ve been given a gift: the possibility of a double portmanteau.

That’s right. After much deliberation and a heaping helping of our usual magic, we present to you: Kourtnis Barkdashian.

Obviously, we have relatively little faith that either of these relationships will have any sort of real staying power. The reality is that these dalliances tend to come and go depending on who needs what and when. But that’s the joy of it really – in a few weeks or months, we’ll be gearing up to put together the next portmanteau when these folks move on to the next stars in their respective skies.

But until then, please join us in welcoming PDA and Kourtnis Barkdashian to the constellation of star-studded romance, however brief their time in the firmament might be. We can only hope that someone somewhere is putting in the effort to make this particular double date happen.

Last modified on Tuesday, 27 April 2021 05:31

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