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Katy England Katy England
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edge staff writer

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The long kiss goodnight

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I can't tell if I talk about them too much. My kids, I mean. Really, I can't - your eyes could be glazed like a donut and I would probably yammer on about them. You might have to fall into a coma, or maybe shake me sternly to get me to realize it's time to stop. Which makes this a rather awkward column, because it's my last one at least, my last one here.

When the kids were born four years ago (seriously?), it tipped my world upside down, you know, the way a rollercoaster will. Sure, it makes everything harder and weird, and you might lose all the contents of your purse while in the loop-the-loop and there may or may not be vomit but you're still having fun. The decision to share the kids with our readers was one that was a mix of a mother's natural desire to yammer about her own kids and a little self-preservation. I mean, it meant that as I was parenting, I was technically doing research for my writing. Which means every diaper I changed was suddenly 'on the clock' as it were. Which made me feel better about my clock being so messed up.

I was so lucky to be at The Maine Edge when they were born. So lucky to have a boss that let me upend my workflow, work remotely, call-in to meetings, and basically become a ninja-employee for weeks or months at a time. I can't remember all of it because that first year the kids were home was a blurry whirlwind. Sometimes I'll look around and remember what I was like back then forgetful, disorganized, and borderline insane and wonder how I remained not only employed but not disinherited by friends and family. Above all, people were forgiving and understanding when I seemed to leave my brain at the bottom of the toybox. And if there were those who grumbled about it, they did it out of earshot which is a kindness I still appreciate.

In a world where many women struggle to find balance, it was nice to feel like I could still contribute and have the chance to spend a lot of incredibly valuable time with my kids. That's a treasure that not everyone gets to have and I value it. I will always value it.

I was also lucky that people seemed to actually like the column enough to actually write me and tell me that they enjoyed it. This is something that I rarely experienced as a writer. Often, the only time you'll hear from someone is when you've stuck your foot in something and you have to apologize or run a correction. Having people take time out of their day to tell me they liked my ramblings meant a lot. Still means a lot.

And I plan to keep rambling. If you do enjoy what I write, you can follow me over at www.ThreeNewEnglands.com. I'll be reprinting the old columns for giggles, but also following up with new stories. Because, even after all this time, I don't know when to stop talking about them.

I'm sure they'll tell me soon enough.

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